GTOG Super Bowl Recap: Take a Knee; Giants win 21-17

By Finesse

We must weigh in on the debate of the day -- should the Patriots have allowed the Giants to score that late TD?  Should the Giants have scored or stopped at the one-yard line?

As repugnant as he is to us and human-kind generally, Belichek made the right decision by letting the Giants score a touchdown with 57 seconds left rather than run the clock down to about 20 seconds and then kick a chip-shot field goal for a 18-17 lead.  And it seems that at least someone (reportedly Eli Manning) on the Giants knew that the best decision they could make would be to not take the free TD and instead kick what should have been the winning field goal (albeit there would have been about 20 seconds left for the Pats).

But here's where things went wrong.  If the Giants actually had the strategy that they were not going to take the free touchdown, WHY HAND THE BALL OFF AT ALL?!?!?!?!?!  This is one of my biggest pet peeves.  If you are just killing time before kicking a field goal, and you don't need to gain any more yards (and the Giants were already at the 6 yard line), why not just have the QB take a knee?  Why are you taking completely unecessary risk by handing the ball off (possible fumble) then having the running back burrow into the defensive line (who will be doing nothing other than trying to create a fumble)?  By handing the ball off to Bradshaw, the Giants were creating a situation where the only thing that could happen was something bad -- a fumble, or the Pats get the ball back.

(NOTE: You could make a decent argument that the Giants should have just taken the touchdown and trusted their defense to stop the Pats, as they did.  But it's clear that they were stuck in some no man's land of decision making, so this assumes that they had decided the best option was to kick the field goal).

Again, if you decide that you want the field goal, nothing good can come from handing the ball off.  I hope you're sitting down for this because I'm about to tell you a hard truth -- NFL players are not necessarily very bright.  They are world-class at doing one thing: being super-athletic.  Decision making is not their strong suit, so a coach's job is to put players in a situation where they have to make as few decisions as possible.

If you need evidence of this point, just look at a few plays earlier when Hakeem Nicks caught a pass for a first down and could have let the Giants run the clock down to zero before kicking a FG if he goes down inbounds.  He went out of bounds.  Or look at the Bradshaw TD -- he knew he shouldn't have scored, but instinct took over and he couldn't help himself.  Or look at Marian Barber III's epic meltdown in Denver earlier this year when he could have iced the game by staying inbounds, but instead went out of bounds and allowed Tebow to come back, win the Denver fans' affection, and make John Elway want to kill someone.

(Another side note: You could argue that Marian Barber killed the Steelers' season with that play as well.  If Chicago wins that game in Denver, the Broncos don't make the playoffs, Ike Taylor never gets abused by Demaryius Thomas, and maybe the Steelers -- who easily could hang with the Giants or Pats -- have a different fate).

The point is this: No matter how many times you tell players not to do something stupid, they'll do something stupid.  Or something bad will happen.  So your job as a coach is to minimize the risk of catastrophic failure.

Or just pray for a little help from above.

GTOG's Top 12 Posts of 2011

By GTOG Staff

In the spirit of the end-of-year-tradition of letting our earlier work this year do our work for us now, here are 12 of our top posts/moments, etc. from the past year.  There are a lot more than 12 here.  Basically, they're things we think you may be interested in reading again.

Thank you, everyone, for a great 2011.

12. Summing up Steigerwald-Lambert-gate

Ryan Lambert from Puck Daddy went toe-to-toe with John Steigerwald about Alex Ovechkin, women with mustaches, and some really unfunny reference to Sidney Crosby being a vampire.  We shamelessly injected ourselves as the voice of reason.

11. Steelers Lose the Super Bowl

Aaron Rodgers' epic performance, Rashard Mendenhall's devestating fumble, and why we weren't that upset.

Top 10 after the jump...

10. Sushi with Hilary Duff

The song speaks for itself.

9. The Crosby Concussion

If something about Crosby's concussion is on our Top lists for 2012, then we won't have a blog anymore. We have no desire to re-read any of these posts, and can't imagine why you would want to, but for the historical record, here is:

- Our Winter Classic recap
- Get To Our Postgame from the Hedman hit, where we wrote, "One negative from this game is only one point from Sid."
- Crosby's initial concussion diagnosis
- The Sequelae

8. The Rebecca Black podcast

About as thorough of an analysis of a bad song as you can get.  It's Friday.

7. Pushing the Capitals' buttons 

Tampa sweeps the Caps ... but the Caps win the Cup in Pittsburgh a few months later

6. Ted Leonsis' Wars on Hearing and Counting

Speaking of the Caps, Ted Leonsis took great offense when we criticized his arena scoreboard for being too loud.  What ensued was pettiness of a degree that could only be achieved by Mr. Leonsis.  For the record, it's probably still way too loud.  Unleash the fury.

A few months later, we asked whether he fudged sellout numbers for something called the Baltimore Hockey Classic.

5. Never Say Never movie review

What happens when two grown men sit alone in an abandoned movie theater watching a documentary about Justin Bieber?

4. The Pens are eliminated

After a regular season nightmare, the Pens went out with a whimper against Tampa and we had all angles covered, with instant reaction and a classic GTOPG.  With a few more days to decompress, we graded the forwards and the defense.

3. When the Walls Came Down

Nothing brings out the raw emotion at GTOG quite like the Bachelor and Bachelorette.  We were there for every contrived twist and turn, whether it was Brad declarative sentences or Ashley's insufferable insecurities.

Brad's season

- Previewing the Ladies of Brad Womack
- Artistry spoke for GTOG while Finesse was embedded with real ladies
- Brad wants so badly to be affectionate with you. Ok.
- When the show moves to some exotic location for repelling, we asked, What is the Island?
- The Women Told All, we may have been the only people listening.
- Wall-to-wall coverage of the Finale, with a preview podcast, a reaction podcast filled with some of the rawest emotion you've ever heard, and some final follow up thoughts on Chantal's heartbreak.

Ashley's season

- Recapping the second episode
- We lose our composure after we are overcome with raw emotion on this podcast
- Written reaction and raw emotion that can only be summoned by one of the most shocking episodes ever

- A scrapbook chronicling JP's fairy tale and Ben's devastation
- A raw emotion podcast from the maternity ward

2. Penn State

On Penn State, Joe Paterno, and how we react to scandals

1. GTOG Nation Welcomes Artistrette

Nothing says 2011 like the arrival of the newest member of GTOG's family.

Happy New Year!

GTOPG: Move along, nothing to see here; Steelers lose 20-3

By Finesse

If there has been one constant in the Ben Roethlisberger era, it's that he really knows how to lay an egg.  When he decides to suck, he puts everything he has into it and really, really sucks.  And so it was last night, where he played on one leg and managed to render meaningless his 330 yards passing because of 4 turnovers and horrifically inept clock management at the end of the first half.  But in spite of this being perhaps the most unwatchable game of Ben's career -- and there have been several -- we're not overly concerned.  Well, maybe just a little.  Let us explain.

We explain, after the jump...


Perhaps the best thing about Roethlisberger is that he doesn't care what he looks like on the field, so long as he is limping.  He plays the ugliest game of any star quarterback, but it works for him.  The downside is that when he isn't 100% healthy, and he was far from that last night, he has the capacity within himself to be awful.  The plus side of his determination to do it his way no matter what, is that when he sucks for a quarter, or a half, or a week, it has absolutely no bearing on whether he is going to suck the next quarter, week, or half.  He plays one way.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  Because again, he doesn't care what he looks like.

Seriously, he doesn't care what he looks like.

And for all the Tomlinisms that are going to come out this week about "all three phases," "[insert month] football" and "what have you," don't think for a second that he's overly concerned with last night's loss either.  He just wants to win the Super Bowl.  His job as a coach is to try to motivate his players to look good on the field, not for the sake of looking good, but for the sake of improving the chances of winning.  He's smart enough to know that the Steelers are so beloved, and the "Steeler Way" so envied, that even if the Steelers look horrible in the process, winning in the playoffs is all that matters.

:-(

This -- the license to play occasionally awful football without it causing a panic that distorts the bigger picture -- is perhaps the strongest and most valuable component of the intangible "Steeler Way."  Even though this is now a passing team -- witness the inexplicable 45 pass attempts with a one legged QB versus 19 run attempts -- the "smash-mouth Steelers" cliche buys this team a ton of slack when it comes to laying eggs.  Because the Steelers are branded as a football team that wins ugly, they have leeway to lose ugly.  The media (and GTOG) rightfully gives the team slack for the occasional stinker like last night, and the players, also rightfully, give themselves enough slack to have a bad game and bounce back.  So long as the Steelers go deep in the playoffs, looking sloppy along the way will be massaged into a virtue, not a criticism.

With that positive spin out of the way, there are three major concerns from this game:

1) Ben's ankle.  No one plays up an injury like he does, but he appears to actually be hurt.

2) Ben's attempt at spontaneous humor on a live microphone. During the second power outage, Ben yelled to no one in particular, "Where's James Harrison when you need him!!"  Ben then gave enough of a smirk to communicate to the confused national audience that his exclamation was intended to be a joke, but not enough of a laugh that we would think he was laughing at his own joke.

3) The defense's determination to give up a long scoring drive to start every game.

Those three things can be fixed with proper medical care, better judgment, and a turnover every once in a while, respectively.

So while last night was brutal, you'll notice that by Friday of this week, no one will be calling for coaches to be fired, no one will be calling for the backup QB (unless it's injury-related), and no one will be calling for any dramatic changes.  Instead, when the dust settles and when everyone calms down, nothing will have changed all that much from before the San Francisco game.  The Steelers are as likely as anyone else to come out of the AFC.*

*Depending on which Ben shows up.

Top 10 Ben Roethlisberger Quotes About his Ankle Injury

By GTOG Staff

[Make sure to check out our live podcast last night from Steelers-Browns]

What can we, mere mortals, even begin to write about a performance like Ben Roethlisberger's last night against Cleveland?  A man of many talents, let's let his own words do the talking (quotes taken from the PG, the Steelers website, and ESPN.com; all pictures from Yahoo).  Only two of these are fake.

10. Ben as Leader of Men

"I just didn't want to let the guys down," Roethlisberger said. "We're in a tight race right now."

9. Ben as The Great Communicator

 Tomlin: "The doctor said you’re good to go; how you feel?"
 Roethlisberger: "OK."
 Tomlin: "You want to go?"
 Roethlisberger: "Absolutely."
 Tomlin: "All right, let's do it."

8. Ben as Poet Laureate

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and sorry I could not break both ankles."

Top 7 after the jump...

7. Ben as The Real Good Grammar Teacher

"I thought my leg was broke.  Honestly."

6. Ben as The Great Describer

"They grabbed [the leg], and it felt like my foot was outside of my leg."

5. Ben as Army Ranger

"I was heading to the hospital, and I said to the team doctor - I was a bit delirious - I said, 'Wait, are my guys still out there on the field? We have to go back!'"

4. Ben as The Great Reflecter

"It was one of the most painful things I’ve ever felt."

3. Ben as The Great Downplayer

"It feels like my ankle is about to explode."

2. Ben as The Great Dramaticist 

“I’m glad he scored, because I wouldn’t have made it all the way down there if we had to run another play,” Roethlisberger said.

1. Ben as We Love Him Best

"At least it takes the pain off my thumb."

[Make sure to check out our live podcast last night from Steelers-Browns]

GTOG Podcast: Big Ben's epic performance and complete Pens/Flyers analysis; We do it live!

What happens when GTOG goes live for the last 5 minutes of Steelers/Browns? We talk Big Ben's Mona Lisa. We tell you the truth about the Penguins. We even take a minute for the NBA. And we do it with unprecedented passion. We don't want to oversell this, but it's the greatest podcast in history.

Click here to subscribe on iTunes

For iPhone/iPad:

Podcast Powered By Podbean

For Flash:

Podcast Powered By Podbean

GTOPG: Like sands through the hourglass, these are the Bungles; Steelers Win, 35-7

By GTOG Staff

Like the crunching of the fall leaves under your feet, or the seasonal depression, every December plays out the same way: the Steelers demolish the Bengals in a game that really could have been a lot closer if not for the fact that the Bengals were involved.

De-cember Football.

As the Steelers' defense does all the time now, they were about to give up a clock-killing scoring drive on the opponent's first possession, only this time the Bengals were determined not to let that happen.  A pretty touchdown pass by Andy Dalton was called back for a false start.  On his next throw, Dalton lofted one just a few fingertips too high.  The Bengals drilled a field goal, only to have that waived off because they took too long.  The Steelers then blocked the most obviously-going-to-be-blocked field goal ever, and it was off to the races.  The Steelers went into beat-down mode.  The Bungles had arrived.

As we discussed on our podcast last week after the Steelers escaped Arrowhead Stadium with a win over a lousy Chiefs team, you should never put any stock into a Steelers' performance against a bad team.  The fact that the Steelers narrowly beat K.C. was meaningless; it indicated nothing about the Steelers' ability to beat a good team in the playoffs.  Yesterday, on the other hand, was encouraging: the Steelers were given an opportunity to bury a feisty team, and they did.

More on the game and the final quarter of the season, after the jump...




- James Harrison has 8 sacks in 8 games, and two three-sack performances in his last 4 games. And he played the first 4 games of the season at far less than 100%. He's 33. Has any linebacker ever been as dominant at that age? Kevin Greene had 15 sacks in 15 games for Carolina at age 36, which is just absurd. Anybody else in the ballpark? With only 8 years as a regular, Harrison is a "young" 33, but his production is, by any definition, exceptional and abnormal.

- With 4 games to play, it looks like the Steelers have a real shot at having two 1,000 yard wide receivers. Currently, Mike Wallace has 977 yards and Antonio Brown has 774. And Brown has at least 67 yards receiving in each of his last 6 games.

- Here's what the Steelers might not have: a 1,000 yard rusher. Rashard Mendenhall has only 634 yards through 12 games.

- The Steelers have Cleveland coming up this Thursday, and then San Francisco the following Monday night, followed by St. Louis and then Cleveland again.  We know San Francisco is good, but we also know that the Steelers always win impressively on national TV heading into the playoffs so that Chris Berman can hold both of his hands up, palms facing in with the side of the hand tapping the table, and then saying, "Don't look now...but look at the PITTSBURGH STEELERS."

"Look ... just want to say ... look ... Pittsburgh ... look ... the Rooneys ... look ... playoffs."

- So if it comes at all, where does the Steelers' fourth loss come from?  Don't worry about sleeping on St. Louis;  take an ambien, drink a bottle of wine, and then take another ambien on St. Louis.  The last game of the year at Cleveland is a win, because Cleveland will have quit by then.  That leaves Thursday at home against the Brownies.  If the Indy, Jax, and KC games have taught us anything, it's that the Steelers are capable of losing to bad teams.  They also taught us that the Steelers are so much better than bad teams that they will usually win even when they play like crap.

- To summarize: it's very possible that the Steelers will win their last 4 games.

GTOPG: Steelers Beat Chiefs, 13-9; Top 7 Reasons Why That Was Terrible

 By Artistry

There are no style points in the National Football League.  No matter how the Steelers beat the Kansas City Chiefs on Sunday night, they beat the Kansas City Chiefs.  They kept pace with Baltimore, and their 8-3 record keeps them in contention for the top seed in the AFC.  Having said that, Jesus was that game terrible. Abominable. Verging on unwatchable. Here are 7 reasons why:

7.  Troy Polamalu might have just hit a wall. And, unfortunately, he hit it with his head. He's only 30, but it's like a neanderthal, living in a cave, fighting the elements, clubbing wild animals on the head for food kind of 30. His reckless, dangerous tackling form - combined with explosive speed and instincts - makes him great, but it also makes him a perpetual injury risk.  And that guy Polamalu hurtled into head first in the 1st quarter wasn't a running back or a tight end. It was 6-6, 290 pound tackle Steve Maneri.  Seeing Polamalu stay down after that hit, then watching him looking dazed on the bench, streaks of silver lining his once jet black hair, it didn't feel right.

6.  The defense continues to underwhelm opponents. The 3 interceptions don't mean anything. If you don't intercept Tyler Palko at least three times, you're just not trying. Here's the thing. The Steelers defense consistently sets the tone for games by giving up lengthy, time-consuming scoring drives as soon as it hits the field.  I can't tell you how many times this has happened this season because I'm not looking it up, but it happened again on Sunday. Against Tyler Palko. 

5.  Tyler Palko. Never have we seen a quarteback gesticulate so wildly in the direction of his receivers to suggest they are somehow at fault for him underthrowing them by 20 yards. Truly impressive. Consider that Dwayne Bowe failed to make any effort to catch Tyler Palko's final pass just to see Tyler Palko's reaction.  As NBC's Chris Collinsworth noted, Palko was "throwing sliders" out there. Come to think of it, having to listen to Chris Collinsworth only enhanced the unpleasantness of being subjected to 4 quarters of Tyler Palko. 

"This one is coming right to you, Ike."

We've got 4 more reasons the Steeler game was terrible, and none of them are good, after the jump...


4.  General Ben won't leave any man behind, but he sure leaves a lot of plays on the field. In 15 years when NFL Films rolls out a highlight package of Ben Roethlisberger's stellar career, we'll see lots of plays like his brilliant Olé of an oncoming rusher and feathery pass to Wesley Saunders in the back of the endzone. We won't see him throwing into double coverage or winning games 13-9 when they should have been 30-9. I wouldn't trade him for anyone except Aaron Rodgers, but the man makes greatness look pretty crappy sometimes. All credit to Finesse for identifying the frustrating Ben paradox on this podcast.

"Yep, my arm is still attached. Good to go."

3.  There was a lot of ball-dropping happening out there.  Mewelde Moore, in the game near the goal-line because he's supposed to be a ball-protector, fumbled (Query: has there been a Steelers' feature back less featured than Rashard Mendenhall?).  Heath Miller had a couple of passes hit him in the hands that he couldn't bring down.  And the increasingly cocky Mike Wallace first dropped a touchdown pass and then a perfectly thrown Big Ben bomb.  He's about two of these sub-par games away from being Torrey Smith.

2.  Mike Tomlin and his staff had an extra week to prepare for Tyler Palko and almost lost. 

1. This game was better than Ambien.  Finesse fell asleep while listening to the game on the radio, woke up while it was still going on, turned it off, then went back to sleep. Which is why I'm writing this recap, because lord knows I didn't want to.

The Steelers host Cincy next week. The Ravens get Cleveland. And you know Baltimore is going to lose one of these.

"We are definitely going to lose one of these."

GTOPG: Steelers Defeat Bengals 24-17; Have We Learned Anything?

By Finesse

Sunday was a day that met expectations.  The Steelers beat Cincinnati on a neutral field in Cincinnati, the Ravens laid an egg against a bad team, and Ben Roethlisberger definitely, 100% was NOT making any excuses when he said, "It was really windy. That’s the only reason I went with the glove, because you can spin it a little better. It definitely affected some throws, but you know me, I’ll never make excuses.”

If you're not injured enough to grimace, just smile and point to God.

So unless you want to try to figure out whether Troy Polamalu was attempting to break up A.J. Green's touchdown catch with his mind or merely blacked out for a second, the only way to go this Monday morning is to look big picture in the AFC after the jump...


Despite having won only one intra-division game, the Steelers are alone in first place in the AFC North.  The Ravens, for the second time this season, followed up a "career defining" game by Joe Flacco with a similarly "career defining" game by Joe Flacco against an inferior opponent, losing 22-17 to Seattle.  If the collective "we" are going to start proclaiming every Flacco win a career defining moment, then the losses should be treated the same way, which essentially means that however we define Joe Flacco's abilities, they're much like his eyebrows in that they could show up anyplace at any time and you wouldn't be surprised.

So the Steelers head into the bye week at 7-3, with 5 of their remaining 6 games eligible for the "we really should win this, but you can be damn sure we're going to lose one of these" status.  The only game where the Steelers might be underdogs is at San Francisco on Monday December 19th, but because of the 49ers' impressive start to the season, they could have the NFC West wrapped up by then meaning Alex Smith's backup is a possibility.  At this point, 11-5 is all but assured, 12-4 is the expectation, and 13-3 is still on the table.  With no one in the AFC doing much to really separate itself from the pack, home-field advantage and a bye week is what we should start preparing for mentally.

[Counterpoint by Artistry: "Houston looks pretty unstoppable on the ground."]

Great in unlimited running space

What this is a long way of saying is that we don't know enough at this point to really know anything about whether they Steelers can get back to the Super Bowl.  Actually, we know that they can, but we have no idea whether they will.

If and when the Steelers play the Ravens again in the playoffs, there will be a 3rd and 8 that the Steelers need to convert to keep a 4th quarter drive going.  Will they convert it?  Who knows?  It's 50/50 whether Antonio Brown makes a grab for 11-yards or Terrell Suggs throws Ben's head like a discuss into the 4th row.

In that same game, Joe Flacco will be faced with a 4th and 7 at midfield with 1:15 left to play and the Ravens down by 4.  Will he convert it?  Who knows?  It's 50/50 whether Woodley clubs him to the turf or Torrey Smith puts a down payment on a condo on Gay Island.

If and when the Steelers play the Patriots, will Ben throw a pick 6 to a defensive lineman for no reason other than that's what Ben does sometimes? Who knows?  It's 50/50 whether Vince Wilfork will be high-fiving his teammates on the sideline while swallowing an entire oxygen tank in one gulp or the Steelers rack up 40 minutes of possession and Ryan Clark concusses every Patriots' receiver.

Textbook form

In that same game, will Ike Taylor stay in Wes Welker's mouth or will Bill Belichik watch Steelers' practices and come up with a way to start setting illegal screens to free Welker?  Who knows?  Actually, I know.  Look for 12 catches for 147 yards from Wes.

If and when the Steelers play the Texans, will their offensive line blow our guys five yards off the ball on every play?  Probably, but then again, does Houston scare you at all when they only beat the Steelers by 7 at home in Week 4 and have never played a playoff game?

To summarize, here's what we know.  The Steelers are good and have a legitimate shot to win the division and get a first-round bye.  Beyond that, it's anyone's guess.  Last season the Steelers had great matchups in the playoffs, getting the Jets and the Ravens and avoiding the Patriots.  This season, the Ravens are a little bit better, but the Patriots are a little bit worse.  The Texans are lurking, but they have no experience.  The Jets are still tough, but that's a matchup Steelers' fans should be praying for.  Cincy should fade admirably into the background, and the AFC west is one week away from having four teams at 5-5.

The bottom line is that today is a day for optimism, even if we can't exactly pinpoint why.

Get to Our Press Conference: Steelers Congratulate Flacco on Early Hall-of-Fame Induction

By GTOG Staff

Welcome, everyone. We'd like to thank the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Baltimore Ravens for making coaches and players available on such short notice to discuss the Ravens' 23-20 luxurious stay on Gay Island victory.  Let's get right to it.

Artistry: This is for Coach Tomlin. Coach, there was some questionable clock management and general confusion on the Steelers' final possession with about 4 minutes to play in the game. Can you comment on that and how you felt knowing Joe Flacco was getting the ball with more than two minutes on the clock?

Andy Reid: Mike, I'll step in on this one if that's ok....

Mike Tomlin:  ...No Andy, I got this.  Let me just say directly that I felt ecstatic putting the ball in Flacco's hands with the game on the line.  I would compare it to being high on nitrous oxide.  Joe Flacco is a man who generally excels in no phases of the game of football, and we as a coaching staff had great confidence that he would find a way not to matriculate the ball down the field.  That said, I had no idea what I was doing on that 4th down delay of game call.  Having an additional three points on the board was desirable at that stage of the football game, but seeing as Shaun Suisham appears to be the only kicker in the National Football League who can't get a kickoff to the endzone, I had no real confidence he could kick a 47-yard-field goal.  So I chose to remain paralyzed by indecision.

"Yeah, I don't know either."

We hear from Ben Roethlisberger, Ray Lewis, and more after the jump...


Finesse:  This is a general question for the Steelers.  If you could point to a single reason for the absolutely stunning choke by the "top-ranked pass defense" in the NFL, what would it be?

James Harrison:  William Gay.

Troy Polamulu:  We don't throw people under the bus here, but William Gay.

Anquan Boldin:  I need to just interject here for a moment and say a couple of words:  William Gay.  In case you hadn't noticed, I was fortunate enough to be covered almost exclusively on that game-winning drive by William Gay.  First, I caught a 21-yard-pass to get us out of that hole on the 8-yard-line.  Then I caught that 4th down pass at mid-field to keep us alive.  Later, I was disappointed to see that I was no longer being covered by William Gay, but then I realized, Torrey Smith is being covered by William Gay!

Torrey Smith:  What a blessing.  Generally, I can't catch, but once I got to Gay Island, I felt much better.

William Gay:  To my credit, I took the blame after the game for my performance.  I completely spoiled an epic 3-sack comeback performance by James Harrison.  My bad.

Mike Tomlin:  James, no!  Do not fire on William Gay!  Holster your weapon!

Stan Savran:  Let's try to reel this back in a bit.  This one is for Ben.  Are the Ravens simply the better team right now?

Ben Roethlisberger:  Stan, I appreciate your calming influence.  One of my favorite things about these men, my teammates, is that we so often look overmatched by quality opponents.  When you combine that with an incomrehensibly bad decision on my part to try to throw a bubble screen through the enormous arms of Terrell Suggs, it creates the optimal scenario for a patented Big Ben comeback.  In today's NFL, it doesn't so much matter if you are deficient...

Mike Tomlin:  In all 3 phases of the football game.

Ben Roethlisberger:  ...Right, thanks Coach.  It doesn't matter if you are deficient in all three phases if you have John Elway 2.0.  Praise be to the offensive line, that's exactly what I am.  It's just that Sunday we left too much time on the clock.  So to answer your question, of course they have a better team in Baltimore.  But we have me.

Stan Savran:  Quick follow up: really bad play by you on the Suggs pick.

Mark Madden:  Speeking uv Suggs, wut a game by my boy Max Starks.  Ask any stripper in tahn, Max is a swthrt.  So heers the kwest-yun.  Why cut Max in the furst place?

Kevin Colbert:  I'll take this one.  Max was fat, so we cut him.  Now I know this opens the organization up to second-guessing and accusations of some kind of a double standard on fat people.  Casey Hampton does appear close to needing a motorized scooter to get to the huddle.  But I would like to say that this was all a motivational ploy to get Max playing at an elite Suggs-nullifying level.  That's what I would like to say.

Ron Cook:  Lamarr Woodley?  I think he might have made a difference.  I mean, really.  I think he might have made a difference, remember?

[Silence in the room.]

Referee Walt Coleman:  Did officiating play any role at all in this loss?  I for one had no clue what was going on out there.  I didn't even realize that last play was a touchdown.  Where am I?  Who are you? 

Antonio Brown:  Come on, now.  The bad officiating went both ways.  I will say that Ray Lewis better be fined for going helmet to helmet on Hines, because that was clear as day.  If Hines goes out like this against Baltimore, that is a sad thing, because he exemplifies this rivalry.  You know what?  I'm dedicating every game against the Ravens from here on out to Hines, and I am going to smoke those fools.  They cannot cover me.

Ryan Clark: Did someone say helmet-to-helmet?

Finesse: This question is for Mr. Sepulveda.  Daniel, can you tell us how it feels to be one more ACL injury away from tying Aaron Smith for the Steelers' team record for most consecutive seasons with season-ending injuries while still being adored by the fan base?

Daniel Sepulveda: Wow, I mean, just to be mentioned in the same breath as a guy like Aaron Smith is a real honor.  He's a true pioneer of the season ending injury and without him, I don't know where I'd be.  Most likely, I'd be punting.

Artistry:  We still haven't heard from the man of the hour, Joe Flacco.  Joe Cool, how did you handle things in the huddle when you're backed up at the 8-year-line with all that pressure and your legacy on the line?

Ray Lewis:  I'LL ANSWER THAT!  HE TOOK CONTROL, BABY!  THE STEELERS ARE THE SAME TEAM WE WHUPPED IN SEPTEMBER!  THEY'RE THE SAME TEAM!  WHAT YOU GOT TO SAY ABOUT HIS UNIBROW NOW, HUH?  WOOOOO!  HUH?

"Any idea when Sid is coming back?"

GTOPG: Steelers beat another bad team in unimpressive fashion so as to lower expectations against Patriots (wow, well done); Win 32-20

By Artistry

When the NFL released its schedule for the 2011 season and he saw New England coming up on the docket in Week 8, Mike Tomlin really had only two options: A) play solid September football, follow that up with three weeks of sound October football, welcome the Patriots to Heinz Field for a clash between the two best teams in the AFC, watch as Tom Brady spreads the field against the Steelers suddenly suspect defense, grimace as Wes Welker and Aaron Hernandez catch a combined 28 passes for 332 yards and 6 touchdowns, shudder as the Pats manage to eat the clock in the 4th quarter by handing the ball to a running back you've never even heard of even though you play in a 16 team fantasy league, then get ready for Baltimore; or B) start the year with a total debacle of a performance against the arch-rival Ravens, take another loss to a playoff team (Houston) that isn't nearly as close as the final score suggests, and string together 5 wins against non-playoff teams that are so uninspired that the Steelers end up home underdogs against New England (-2.5). He chose "B."

Here's the thing. The Steelers could be a top flight but underachieving team that overcomes a spate of early season injuries to again emerge as the class of the AFC. We could beat the Patriots. We just have no expectation whatsoever that that will actually happen. So kudos to Coach Tomlin. Brilliant strategy.

 - The most promising thing we took from Sunday's game in Arizona is that it never felt for a moment like the Steelers could lose it. We can't say the same thing about the wins against Jacksonville and Indianapolis. Really, you can't have enough games where you have absolutely no fear that the Steelers will completely relax in the 4th quarter and allow a miracle comeback; i.e., you can't have enough games against Kevin Kolb. The Steelers obvious weaknesses through the early part of the season - the woeful pass protection, the deplorable run blocking, and James Farrior - all were present against the Cardinals. It's just that bad teams can't consistently take advantage of them.

- Ben Roethlisberger, on the other hand, can take advantage of bad teams. He was brilliant in sticking the dagger in the Cards when they managed to pull within 3 in the second half. Perhaps the best example of Ben's preternatural pocket awareness was the play where he sensed pressure from no fewer than three rushers and managed to find Ike Redman for a little dump off and first down. He even brought back the patented, Oscar-worthy elbow flex/arm roll combination that's brought him so much critical acclaim over the years. When one day someone makes a documentary about Ben's heroism, Dan Dierdorf will lobby to narrate it.

- Much has been made of Mike Wallace's impact on the offense, and that's well-deserved. If you don't realize how great Mike Wallace is, consider he is once again averaging more than 20 yards-per-catch (20.3) after averaging 21 ypc last season and 19.4 ypc as a rookie in 2009. Randy Moss never averaged 20 ypc in a season. We've been watching the beginning of a career that could be historically great. But don't lose sight of the fact that Roethlisberger has been consistently targeting Antonio Brown. On Sunday, we saw that focus on getting Brown the ball start to pay off, as Brown hauled in 7 passes for 102 yards and made one spectacular catch on 3-and-5 during a game-sealing 3rd quarter drive. If the Steelers can arrange to use New England's offensive line next week, this is a passing attack that could really explode against the Patriots.

- Note to Rashard Mendenhall: you suck, and you're in danger of losing your starting job to Mewelde Moore. There. Now we can look forward to Rashard Mendenhall running for 100 yards next week.

- So pleased Lamarr Woodley decided to join us this season. Here's GTOG co-founder Finesse, stuck today on jury duty: "Woodley grabs people like a grizzly bear scooping a 50 pound salmon out of the water in Alaska."

- We don't even recognize the Steelers defensive line anymore, although one of those guys does look like Ironhead Heyward, and that McClendon person seems inspired by the Steelers dedication of the remainder of the season to all-time great Steelers d-lineman Aaron Smith. Finesse is unsentimental. "There is no doubt that Aaron Smith has been a great player for the Steelers, but that time has come to an end," he said. "That is, his time as a Steeler needs to come to an end. I'm sure that if Smith was healthy, he could still be a very solid contributor, but the chances of that happening are lower than the chances of Big Ben not wincing on camera during a game. He's been knocked out with season-ending injuries in something like 4 of the last 5 years; as tough as it will be to see him go, it's unfair to ask the Steelers to continue paying a guy to play 4 games and then tear a muscle somewhere in his upper body." Besides, we can still count on Willie Colon for that.

Tearing tendons and collecting paychecks since 2010

Wake Up With GTOG: Ron Cook Reminds You That Mike Wallace is Fast; Steelers Win 32-20

By Finesse

A full Post Game will be up later today, but let's get the morning started with some Ron Cook poetry featuring rhetorical questions, needless repetition, bizarre use of italics and colons, and at least one "indeed."

Shame on Arizona Cardinals defensive coordinator Ray Horton.
Cornerback Richard Marshall isn't.
Here's the first of two amazing things:
And the second amazing thing:
We're talking unbelievable speed.
Teams keep kicking to Hester.
He keeps doing it.
How does this keep happening?
Oh, it's real, all right.
It showed up on the scoreboard.
Deflating for the Cardinals?
Deflating, indeed, Cardinals coach Ken Whisenhunt admitted.
Still, Wallace won.
"He's a freak show out there ... "
That day is coming fast.
Of course, it's coming fast.
With Wallace, how else would it come?

Tough crowd.

GTOPG: Blame it on the wind, but no excuses; Steelers barely hang on to win, 17-13

By Artistry

If there is one thing that's almost sure to be more entertaining than an October football game between the Steelers and Jacksonville Jaguars, it's the Steelers trying to explain why they didn't win said football game by three touchdowns.

"I never make excuses," said quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, prompting everyone at GTOG headquarters to take out our notepads and prepare to take copious notes. "When [the wind] is blowing, you have to put a lot of spin on the ball. I just wasn't doing that."

"The wind most definitely was a factor, but we won't use that as an excuse at all," added receiver Mike Wallace.

"It was gusting pretty good," continued Roethlisberger, and I swear to you, I'm not making this up. "Dan [Sepulveda] said on the last punt he wanted to take off and run. He didn't even want to punt it. It was what it was. It was kind of Heinz Field. One series it blows one way, then it swirls on you. Like I said, no excuses."

"I blacked out this morning when I was getting dressed, but no excuses."

- Rashard Mendenhall's 146-yard game came against a very solid Jacksonville run defense. No other running back has mustered more than 75 yards against the Jags. As Ron Cook put it this morning: "The team's best back, by far." We've been telling you the same thing for weeks, and we've been using complete sentences.

- The run defense, on the other hand, is the Steelers single biggest concern. Playing at home, against a rookie quarterback, they should be giving up next to nothing on the ground. As recently as last season, we took that for granted. Now, they can't stop anybody. Maurice Jones Drew was 4 yards shy of being the third back to top 100 yards against the Steelers in 6 games. Pittsburgh is now 15th in the league in rushing yards allowed. Do one thing exceptionally well, and you can cover up for a lot of deficiencies. But considering that the Steelers' other big weakness on defense is that they're susceptible to getting carved up through the air by accurate passers, that adds up to a bad defense.

- To this point, we've been telling you nothing you see on a given Sunday matters. September and October football is not November and Dee-cember football. Now, that changes. The Cardinals are coming off a bye week, and you never want to give Kevin Kolb extra preparation time. Follow that with consecutive home games against New England and Baltimore. In a few weeks, the Steelers really will have no excuses.

- Coming soon to GTOG: Finesse will have 360 degree, top to bottom, from all angles, every inch covered, coverage of the NFL. If we aren't writing about it, that means it doesn't matter.

"Follow GTOG on Twitter."



Get to Our Postgame: "I'll be there until they take me off on a cart, which has happened before"; Steelers Trounce Titans, 38-17

By Artistry

If you were flipping channels Sunday between 1 pm and 1:30 EST, there was about a 75% chance that when you happened upon your local CBS station, you got a super closeup assisted eyeful of a shoe. Ben Roethlisberger's brave, stalwart, enormous pink shoe.

Eventually, the camera pulled back to reveal Ben himself, and we heard Dan Dierdorf, who is apparently afraid that if he stops talking a bomb will detonate somewhere, intone, "Just look at him limp." Oh, we saw. It was a spectacular performance on many levels. After Roethlisberger threw 5 touchdown passes on one leg behind half an offensive line, he treated us to one of the following actual statements. That's right, GTOG Nation, it's time for Guess the Real Ben Quote:

"All credit to BA. It took him 5 years to implement a game plan with quick drop passes to keep my legs from getting taken out every time I throw the ball, but he really came through today. I'd also like to thank the Lord for giving me the strength to tolerate the searing pain in my foot on every single play today. No complaints. Band of brothers."

OR

"I just don't want to let my guys down. I want to give them my best. I'll be there until they take me off on a cart, which has happened before. I want to put this team and this offense in the best position to win football games."

Guess we gave this one away in the headline.

"It's a migraine. It paralyzes the senses. But I'm fine. Let's study the playbook."

- Bruce Arians did call a terrific game, but where has that been until now? When you're playing with a line that's in tatters, how are you not using the whole field with quick hit passes every week? We complained after the Houston loss that Arians was too focused on getting Mike Wallace the ball on slow-developing plays, rendering the Steelers predictable and Ben vulnerable. Problem, at least for a day, solved. Hines Ward and Heath Miller caught 10 balls between them, which is something we should continue to see. Work the middle of the field. All the good teams are doing it.

- Rashard Mendenhall must have watched Jonathan Dwyer hit that hole on the 76-year-run and thought to himself, "I would have done a 360 degree spin move there." That, and "Why don't I get that kind of blocking?" Two things to keep in mind here: 1) We understand the frustration with Mendenhall. He tends to dance too much. But he has been no less a victim of poor offensive line play than Big Ben. He is by far the best running back on this team, and the job is his as soon as he's healthy; 2) If Mendenhall is in the game instead of Dwyer, that's a touchdown.

- No idea how Lamarr Woodley went from complete non-factor to Lawrence Taylor in one week's time. Maybe he was just lulling Tennessee into a sense of complacency, because the Titans thought it was prudent to try to block him one on one on a passing down with running back Ahmad Hall. That didn't end well for them. And what an interception.

- The Steelers finally shut down somebody's running game, and Woodley and Polamalu looked like someone finally told them, "Guys, just a heads up, you're each getting paid like $1 million to play in this game. Just this one. Today.", but some problems on the defensive side of the ball are not going away. There was another long, clock-eating opening drive. There was poor tackling, notably by James Farrior and Ryan Clark. And the secondary became confused at times, thinking Nate Washington still plays for the Steelers and actually exhorting him to catch passes. But the weaknesses of these Steelers can almost always be overcome by the Steelers strengths, as long as they're playing to them.

- Playing offensive tackle in the National Football League can't possibly be as easy as the long-injured, semi-retired, oft-fat Max Starks made it look on Sunday. Can it?

- Ironhead's boy Cam is a player. Watch for the anticipated defensive line "rotation" to transition to some sort of a "Cam and Ziggy are playing ahead of Aaron Smith" configuration. It's hard to imagine the 35-year-old Smith suddenly getting consistently healthy at this stage.

- BA must figure out how to get the ball in Antonio Brown's hands a few more times a game. What a burst that kid has when the ball hits his hands.

- No play illustrated how things finally clicked for the Steelers this week better than the fake punt call. That was inspired. Danny Sepulveda. You can't keep a weapon like that in the holster.

"James, we didn't mean... James, no!"

Full Pens/Steelers Recaps Coming Tomorrow...

...Stay tuned.

GTOG Podcast: The Truth about the Steelers; Preview of our Pens 2011-12 Season Preview

We start by recapping the Steelers' frustrating loss to the Texans and addressing the sense of pessimism overwhelming the Steelers' fan-base.  But then ... we get optimistic at about the 12 minute mark and talk Penguins.  It's impassioned.  It's emotional.  It's the podcast.  GTOG Everybody, and subscribe on iTunes.

Listen here with Flash:

Podcast Powered By Podbean

Listen here on the iPhone/iPad:

Podcast Powered By Podbean

The official Penguins preview post will be up later today. While you're waiting, follow GTOG on Twitter. 207 people Everybody's doing it.

GTOPG: Top 9 Things Wrong with the Pittsburgh Steelers

By Artistry

If you want a recap of a 17-10 loss that should have been 35-10, read the newspaper. We're going straight to the analysis. And the emotion. Here, in no particular order, are 9 things wrong with the men convening in the locker room of the Pittsburgh Steelers football team:

9. They're playing August football.

Not October football. And certainly not De-cember football. In far too many instances, you get the impression certain guys are still learning how to read a blitz (Antonio Brown), are unsure if they have contain on basic running plays (Troy Polamalu), or are just hoping to earn a spot on the practice squad (the whole offensive line). Blame it on the lockout if you like, but we're 4 games into the season, and the signs are almost all bad.

Bad sign.

8. William Gay is the least of their problems.

Really.

7. They can't stop the run.

Arian Foster has made a lot of defenses look bad in the last calendar year, and that Texans offensive line is every bit as good as advertised. I can't remember seeing the Steelers getting blown off the ball like that. But this was no anomaly; Ray Rice dominated them in Week 1. It doesn't matter that Foster and Rice are stars; nobody runs on Pittsburgh. Until lately. Foster's 42-yard-run was the longest Dick Lebeau's defense has given up since like 2006, per the insufferable Dan Dierdorf. And the defense was most exposed on Foster's patented cutback runs. You know, the times when he had no blockers, and the Steelers still couldn't tackle him. I'm looking at you Troy Polamalu. Is Lamarr Woodley even playing? You know, the Steelers might not be able to stop the pass either. We're pretty sure they can't, but Matt Schaub never really had to find out.

More after the jump...

6. James Farrior is old and slow, in addition to undersized.

The tone was set on the very first drive of the game. You remember. The one that lasted like 20 minutes. Arian Foster went mano a mano with Farrior on 3rd and 1 and just destroyed him. Later, he got smoked in pass coverage by Owen Daniels and owned on the Foster touchdown run. Next time someone in the Pittsburgh media makes a stink about Farrior ceding some of his playing time to Larry Foote, just show this tape.

5. Shaun Suisham needs to be more of a leader.

Tear out a paper towel dispenser in the locker room or something. The men are looking to you.

Irreplaceable locker room presence.

4. Offensive line, Band of Brothers Tottering Misfits

When the Texans sacked Ben Roethlisberger - and they sacked him, oh how they sacked him - they converged on him in a pack. Like the time when the Steelers had 7 men "protecting" the quarterback, the Texans rushed 4, it was no problem for them at all, and they may have actually appreciated the challenge. Trai Essex and Marcus Gilbert are possibly less qualified to start at tackle in the National Football League than Ben Flajnik is to carry a network drama in prime time. Even the golden child Maurkice Pouncey cost the Steelers a touchdown with a ridiculous late hit. Everything happening on the offensive side of the ball - i.e. very bad things - traces back to this linepocalypse.

Miss you. 

3. They're giving Roethlisberger way too much material.

Another MRI. A possible broken foot. A week of "will he or won't he play?"  Willing his team to a near miracle finish, even as his battered legs buckle beneath his massive frame. He grimaces. He shakes his throwing hand. And after a gut wrenching loss, in the postgame presser, he comes through with the money quote:

“I’ve still got to make plays. I’ve got to make it easier on my guys and I didn’t do that today.”

That Ben is a hell of a player. If he had Brady's offensive line, maybe he'd have 4 rings. But let's be clear. He loves playing this role. The humble warrior rides again. The offensive line just made that way too easy for him, didn't they?

Leave no soldier behind.

2. B.A.'s M.O. is D.O.A.

It's hard to fault Bruce Arians for dialing up a play for Mike Wallace 10 times a game, but what happened to the juggernaut offense? You know, with the 4 dangerous wideouts. And the 1,500 yard running back. It doesn't seem like Arians and Roethlisberger have much confidence in anyone but Wallace. Mendenhall hasn't done much lately, but he's running behind the same line that's putting Roethlisberger's limbs on a shish kabob and feeding them to Mario Williams. What's that? You say Mewelde Moore looks like the better player? OK, you win.

1. My Dad and Brother [Ed. Note: And Finesse's Dad]

Everyone knows fans like my dad and brother. They sit in front of the television for 3 straight hours and say things like, "This is terrible", "This is the end of an era", and "This is terrible." The litany of pessimism is interrupted only by Steeler touchdowns, after which they will whoop, holler, pump their fists, then settle back on the couch and say something like, "That was too little, too late. The season's over." I'm not saying that the two of them had any impact on the game. But it's possible. The Force is strong with them. I really mean this. Just kidding, guys, it's not your fault. But if you add the fact that virtually everyone on Twitter was campaigning to fire the entire coaching staff and target Andrew Luck in the draft, you're talking about a real torrent of negative energy. It can't help. We say focus on the positive. We're only a quarter of the way through a competition involving 30 imperfect teams. We've got a lot to build on here. Did you see that 4th quarter punt by Danny Sepulveda? That guy is a weapon.

Need more of this.