Kamis, 05 April 2012

Farewell to Daniel Sepulveda, the Bo Jackson of Punters

By Artistry (follow me on Twitter)

What began in 2007 with the promise of punting immortality ended today with a couple of paragraphs buried under news about recovering running backs coach Kirby Wilson. The Steelers cut ties with legendary, strapping, 6-3, 230 pound punter Daniel Sepulveda.

"Yeah I punt and I'm jacked. YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?!?!"
"I've never seen a punter with guns like that.  Biceps, pecs, lats.  This guy had all the tools.  That's a man you go into battle with," said quarterback Ben Roethlisberger. 

After being taken in the 4th round of the NFL draft, the expectation was that Sepulveda would be the next punting superstar, a cross between LeBron James, Taylor Lautner, and Ronaldo.  Yet this remarkable physical specimen had a meniscus made out of Aaron Smith's triceps, opening up repeated opportunities for new, permanent punter Jeremy Kapinos.

When reached for comment this morning, Kapinos said, "Mmm. You mean I have to go to training camp?"


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